Conversation recorded October 2024
Men don't talk about their mental health at work. Not because they don't struggle, but because they can't predict what will happen if they do. Todd Hopwood changed that in his workplace with a whiteboard and a number out of ten.
In conversation with Todd Hopwood. Todd is a senior manager in local government and a powerful voice on mental health at work on LinkedIn. For years he has been a carer for a family member with serious mental health challenges.
Two lives, and the cost of keeping them separate
For most of his career, Todd told nobody at work what was happening at home. There were hospital mornings and crisis calls, then straight into the office to perform, get promoted and carry on. It looked like it was working, which made it worse. Eventually his marriage broke down, and he realised the barriers he'd built to protect himself didn't switch off at the office door.
"Once you turn yourself off, you can't do it just for work." Todd Hopwood
A score on the wall
When Todd started a new job, he read about scoring your mental health out of ten each day and telling someone. True to form, he went all in: in his first week, he wrote his score on a whiteboard wall for the whole office to see. It was a three or four. The story spread across the organisation of 1,500 people, and over the next six to nine months, 10 to 15 people from other teams, mostly men, came to find him for a coffee and a chat. A couple of them were in a really bad place and got help.
It doesn't always get easier, and that's fine
Years later, Todd still dreads writing up a three. His instinct is still to say "I'm alright" when someone asks. He does it anyway. That honesty matters, because it shows people that vulnerability is a practice you choose, not a personality you either have or don't. He also wants all of us to ask the second question, because the first answer is usually a deflection.
Trust comes before any programme
Todd's workplace later brought in mental health first aiders, and he trained as one. But nobody came to him because of the badge. They came because of what they'd seen him do. For a lot of men, the risk of not knowing how someone will react is reason enough to stay silent.
"If you can't trust what the next step will be, you're probably not going to make that first step." Todd Hopwood
Petra's take
This is exactly why I don't think a badge is enough. So many workplaces train people to respond in a crisis, but the real work happens much earlier, in the messy middle of everyday life. People open up to those who go first. That's why our culture champions are trained to model the behaviour, not just signpost to services, and why they keep meeting every month so it doesn't fade. Todd didn't wait for a programme. He wrote a number on a wall. Small brave acts stack up.
Three things to try this week
Share your own score out of ten with one colleague, honestly, even if it's a four.
Ask the second question. When someone says they're fine, ask again, and give them room to answer.
If you're a champion or first aider, go first. Talk about your own week before you ask about theirs.
Bring this to your team: explore our Champions training
Watch the full conversation on YouTube
Related insights: High Performance Without Burnout · Inclusion Is Business
About the author. Petra Velzeboer is a psychotherapist, keynote speaker and author of Begin With You and Digital Wellbeing. She works with leaders and People teams to build healthy cultures where people perform at their best.